I hope he's listening

My parents, my father in particular, are very religious. 

Since I was a tiny child, I was taught about God and his wondrous ways. I was told that it was okay to ask him for help when I needed it, and that he would love me, even if I sinned. I was told that talking to him didn't require an alter, and that he was always watching me. 

I don't have a very distinct belief on God. I say I believe in him, though sometimes I wonder if it's because I really do, or say I do because I feel bad letting my parents down. 

I'd say it's more the first. I do believe that some one is up there watching my life go by ,and sometimes, I wish he'd intervene. 

My emotions, for the fast few weeks in particular, have been on a roller-coaster. The ups are so ups, and the downs make me so down, and I've just been riding it out. 

But now, on this weekend that is jam-packed with work and stress, another situation has brought itself upon me that I can't avoid. 

I have an interview tomorrow for a job I want more than anything, and my best friend's brother is hospitalized, not even breathing by himself, and I'm just so nervous. 

I am praying and hoping and wishing for a happy ending. I am blindly putting my faith in powers beyond me that everything will work itself out, eventually. 

I just hope that he's listening.